Random Redvines
home contact archive theme

ah-shiyt:

dan-will-make-you-howell:

splantamello:

hotaimee:

thiscorpsofbrothers:

splantamello:

hydrogyne:

cute things to call your girlfriend:

  1. sugar
  2. honey
  3. flour
  4. egg
  5. salt

6. 1 tbs of butter

7. stir thoroughly

8. pour into baking pan

9. we forgot to preheat the oven to 375

why would we have to preheat her if she’s already hot

you smooth fucker

(via rosiedoll)

lmaoalien:

follovved:

buttlicked:

follovved:

buttlicked:

follovved:

KNOCK KNOCK

WHOS THERE

LIL OLE’ LADY

LIL OLE’ LADY WHO

I DIDNT KNOW U COULD YODEL

 

(Source: straighthater, via geniusly)

paleful:

u know its ok to admit that u love me in my ask

(via crystallized-teardrops)

invokes:

Expensive?
Very expensive.

- The fault in prices of clothes

(Source: academy, via runfrom-thelight)

staff:

Everyone with a top hat is now marked for account deletion. This is the only way we could destroy this horrible website. Happy April Fools day.

(Source: petervidani, via fake-mermaid)

slayboybunny:

"sir what you did is literally 100 percent illegal"
"ok but get this: im a rich white person" 
"oh sorry about that sir" 

(via unescapable)

brigette-rose:

catch a falling nugget put it in your pocket save it for a hungry day

(via bastille)

bitter-ghost:

come lay down next to me and i’ll tell you about all the dogs i saw today 

(via hotboyproblems)